You CAN Defeat Self-Doubt with Strategic Self-Talk
Are you and self-doubt old friends? Do you go way back to early childhood when the seeds of uncertainty were first planted? If so, you aren’t alone. Many otherwise successful, outwardly happy professional women suffer from self-doubt and don’t know why. They don’t realize that self-doubt is at the heart of all their unfulfilled desires.
Said another way . . . Anything you’ve ever dreamed about and wanted for yourself that didn’t come to pass, little by little, ate away at your self-confidence causing you to doubt your abilities and your worth. Leaving in its wake sadness and regret.
Here’s the double whammy: your sadness isn’t just because of what did or didn’t happened in the past. It’s also the fear that what you want in the future won’t happen either! What do you suppose creates these fears? That’s right – your thoughts.
Yes, You Can Defeat Self-Doubt! The good news is that you can do something about your thoughts! I’m here to show you how you can defeat self-doubt through strategic self-talk, once and for all. I wrote a blog post on “How You Talk to Yourself Affects Your Health” that you’ll find informational. It will give you insights into how self-sabotage, negative self-talk, poor health, and self-doubt can deter progress in your professional life and create havoc in your relationships.
Turning negative self-doubt into positive self-talk is easier than you think. Here’s how:
Four Steps to Defeat Self-Doubt
with Strategic Self-Talk
Step #1 – Learn how to redirect your thoughts.
First, learn to listen for and pay attention to your negative self-talk and feelings. Acknowledge them. Don’t try to silence them. Just be with them.
Next, redirect your negative self-talk and feelings away from what you don’t want to what you do want with this powerful sentence taken from The Science Of Being Well by Wallace Wattles: “I am looking forward to ____________________.”
Here’s how it works: Suppose that the voice inside your head is telling you that you’re not as good as someone or as far along as you should be, and that leaves you feeling insecure or insignificant.
Say instead: I am looking forward to the time when people see and value me for who I am and all this great stuff I’m learning to do.
By redirecting your thoughts in the direction of what you want, sets energy in motion that creates what you desire.
Step #2 – Practice this release and replace technique.
Self-doubt is a wet-blanket emotion. It dampens everything. Many women who come to me for coaching say that they experience it as a lethargic, bone-deep sadness.
How they feel is very real and very heavy. It affects their blood pressure, adrenals, and digestion. Many women seek medical help for depression to find relief from this poisonous emotion.
Hold on a minute: before you go down the prescription route, you owe it to yourself to heal through the power of your thoughts. Self-Doubt can surface like depression and there is no pill that will cure self-doubt.
Here’s how: Once again, tune in to your negative self-talk. Notice how it feels and recognize the self-doubt it creates. Acknowledge it. No shame. No blame. Next:
Acknowledge by saying: I recognize you now, self-doubt. And, I understand why you haunt me.
Clear by: waving your hands outward or upward and away from your body.
Release by saying: I release you. I no longer need you.
Hug by: wrapping your arms around you and give yourself some love.
Replace your negative self-talk by saying: I’m replacing self-doubt with belief in myself. I can, and I will.
There. Don’t you feel better already?
Step #3 – Put together a self-confidence list.
(This is my favorite part.)
Take a piece of paper, make yourself a cup of tea, sit somewhere comfy and write down at least 25 positive qualities and attributes you like about yourself.
Next, take a picture of your self-affirming list and make it the wallpaper on your smart phone. Then, upload it to your computer and make it your screen saver. That way it’s handy for you to refer to when a replacing thought is needed. This list is now your new best friend!
Step #4 – Nourish your body and fuel your brain.
How you think is, in part, connected to how you eat. If you feed crappy food to your body, it will be undernourished and unable to generate healthy, beneficial thoughts.
Crap in = Crap out!
Therefore, make food choices that will nourish and sustain your body and increase your vitality. By doing so, you’ll supply fuel to your brain that will empower thoughts that positively support and nurture you. That way your brain will have the energy it needs to create healing thoughts.
Wonder what types of food your body and brain need? Read my blog post, “Self-Love Food: Heal Your Body. Better Your Life” to find out.
But, Why Is This So Important?
Self-doubt doesn’t happen overnight. It’s something that grows over time. It begins with one significant person saying one negative thing about you. Repeatedly. After awhile, you believe them. Their thoughts become your thoughts.
No more! Choose your mirror as the place where you turn your life around by making different self-talk decisions.
One of the best things you can do is learn how to strategically talk to yourself in a way that is positive, uplifting, and supportive.
You are amazing!
You are beautiful!
You have nothing to prove to anyone – especially not to yourself.
You no longer need to allow other people, things, or difficulties and challenges to create any self-doubt, at all, within you.
You’re very OK!
We’re all on this journey together. It doesn’t matter that some are further along – they’re the way-showers for the rest of us. You will get there! Don’t give up. Re-strategize.
- Just because your health is down one day doesn’t mean you won’t get healthy. Take positive, healthy steps tomorrow, and one day you will have health.
- Just because you seem to keep making the same mistakes, doesn’t mean that you will never get it right. Mistakes are how we practice getting right later.
- Just because you fell off your diet, or gained some weight, or neglected to exercise, or ate something not so good for you, doesn’t mean you are a failure. You just needed a temporary break. Resume your healthy regimen.
You are a powerful woman! That is a woman with self-power because she is choosing Self-Belief over self-doubt.
You can defeat self-doubt with strategic self-talk. You can let go of negative self-talk and release self-judgment. You can become the inwardly happy professional woman you are meant to be. You can, and you will make it.
Embrace the journey. I’m right by your side.
Need some help? Click the aqua bar below and learn about my program on Emotional Empowerment.
Leave a comment. What is your new, positive, self-affirming statement?